Ghosting is a bitter phenomenon for romance fighters. Just imagine when you are unfortunately dear and are ready to say love, the crush even disappears without a trace. Being left without clarity no longer makes the heart chaotic but broken and scattered.
Why the crush is ghosting us?
We think ghosting is an aggressive-passive strategy by someone to break the love relationship unilaterally and suddenly.
Ghosting is very common during the love-bombing phase, and there are many reasons why someone can bear to ghosting their potential partners. Generally, because they feel ghosting is the best way to say that they are no longer interested in you or feel the relationship will not work in the future, indirectly.
But rather than having to end the relationship through one-on-one talking and face all the consequences, the perpetrators of ghosting would rather avoid and disappear from circulation without clarity. Not infrequently, they also break contact through all lines of communication, so it is difficult to contact.
In fact, whatever the reason for someone to decide to disappear without news, ghosting can cause psychological injury to the “victim”.
Tips to Avoid Being Hit by Ghosting
Who knows what is inside their heart? We also cannot force the feelings of others to remain the same and in line with our expectations.
But maybe who knows, some of the tips below can help you avoid being hit by a crush when the romance flowers are ready to bloom. If in the end the relationship cannot be maintained, you two can still finish it well without harming either party.
1. Drag and Drop When Love-bombing
An expensive selling attitude may have become your mainstay trick when love-bombing to captivate the crush. But be careful not to get engrossed. Remember, first impressions are important.
In fact, the research team from Israel and New York said that the continuation of a high-priced attitude makes you look unattractive for a long time and is considered not serious about building relationships. This is likely because they feel all their efforts have not been appreciated and welcomed by you. The cold and indifferent attitude that you “sell” also looks like you underestimated them.
Vice versa, if you are too “stuck” alias clingy and lead possessive to the crush. They may think of you as a person who is annoying or just too controlling, and they may lose their feeling to you.
So you have to be very clever in devising a “push-and-pull” strategy during love-bombing. It also shows that you are an open person who has an interesting and happy life, to keep the love flowers blooming. For example, occasionally giving a surprise or a small gift for them. But on the other hand, give a mysterious impression by avoiding opening yourself up and exposing all your life stories at one time.
Make the crush always curious by continuing to lure himself to take the initiative to find out more about you. Imagine you are an onion that needs to be peeled layer by layer so that in the end, they know you inside and out and feel more connected.
2. Do Not Mostly Love-bombing via Chatting Application
Spending more time in the real world than just love-bombing via mobile can be a pretty powerful way to avoid being hit by ghosting. Because ghosting is usually the result of an untreated miscommunication.
When you talk face to face, at least you can find out whether you both have chemistry or if you feel interested in reading each other’s body language and speaking style. Chemistry and genuine interest cannot always be reflected merely through chat in chat.
Try to choose conversation topics, which ones do you think are more interesting to talk about in chat application and which are more suitable for chatting when meeting face to face. In this way, spending time with them in cyberspace and the real world will always feel warm, exciting, and not boring.
3. Pay Attention to The Movements
If you have been relieved or have been in touch for a long time, surely you can guess the routine of your relationship. Like the habit when chatting or how enthusiastic they are when you discuss certain things.
Now if you have used all kinds of ways to captivate them, but they have begun to be reluctant, such as starting to reply to old chats without clarity or beginning to be difficult to contact and be invited to meet for no reason, there is a possibility of you being hit by the ghosting.
But actually, you should not be offended quickly. Ghosting can sometimes really be a blessing. You might have just avoided a potential boyfriend who is not good for you in the future. Be thankful for that, and move on to find a new heart mooring.