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A F F I R M A T I O N S

 

"Emotional Intelligence,"
      by Daniel Goleman

Don't eat the marshmallow!!

Marshmallow a-n-t-i-c-i.......................p-a-t-i-o-n
There's a simple test you can give a 4 year old that's a better predictor of his or her future success in life than his or her EQ.  Leave the child alone in a room with a marshmallow, telling him he can either eat the marshmallow immediately, or if he can wait until the instructor comes back, he can have 5 marshmallows.

Some of the children eat the marshmallow immediately.  Others manage to make it through.  These kids will do better later on.  In psychology this is called "delayed gratification," and "frustration tolerance."  

AFFIRMATION:  If a child can wait 20 minutes with a marshmallow sitting right in front of him, I can wait for ____________________, and __________________.  I will work on my frustration tolerance so that I not only can wait, but I manage the emotions involved in being frustrated.  

  • I'll clean the garage before I watch t.v. this weekend.
  • I'll mow the lawn before I go ride my motorcycle.
  • I'll save $100 a month so I can afford a great vacation and not be in debt.
  • I'll weed the garden so I'll have good flowers and vegetables.
  • I'll postpone the Big Mac until I've met my weight goal.
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The world is so full of a number of things

I'm sure we should all be as happy as kings!

                
- Robert Louis Stevenson

Affirmation:  Every day I will look with new eyes and find the wonder around me.  I will use the beauty all around me to restore my soul and ease my stress.  I will take delight in small things.
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AFFIRMATION:  
I am a star 
and I have the right to shine!
  

 
 

 

QUOTATION:  
"Work like you don't need the money, love like you've never been hurt, and dance like no one's watching."  

~Mark twain
Royalty free image:  www.comstock.com 

 

 

 

     
   
 

Photo by JustImagineInc

 
QUOTATION:  "We don't see things as THEY are, we see things as WE are."

AFFIRMATION:  When I look at the clouds, I will see angels.  I look on the bright side of things with optimism and joy.

 

WE RECOMMEND
"How to Live Your Life with Emotional Intelligence"

 

 


"Let me assert my firm belief that the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.  This nation is asking for action and action now.  --Franklin Delano Roosevelt
CLICK HERE to hear this famous speech.

AFFIRMATION:  Today I will not let fear stop me from reaching my goals.  I will take action where I need to.  I will not let fear paralyze me.  It is only by acting, doing, and making decisions that I can define who I am.  I accept that sometimes I will succeed and sometimes I will fail, but I will remind myself that no failure is permanent.      

 

 

     
  We don't quit playing because we grow old, we grow old because we quit playing.

Take everything you like seriously, except 
YOURSELF.

-Rudyard Kipling

AFFIRMATION:  I will celebrate my Inner Fool and play!

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WHEN I AM OLD I SHALL WEAR PURPLE WITH A RED HAT 

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When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go and doesn't suit me,
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we have no money for butter.
And I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.

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  Affirmation:  I can be whoever I want to be.  I am only limited by my imagination!
 

 

 

A GENERATIONAL SHIFT WITHOUT PRECEDENT

A Harris Poll found that "young men in their twenties are 7% more likely than young women to give up pay for more time with their families."  

Studies show ... the more involved the dad is, the better both sons and daughters do in math and quantitative abilities and verbal abilities.

90% of homeless/runaway children are from fatherless homes.  Father presence is the most important factor by far in preventing drug abuse. and teen pregnancy.  ["Why Dads Matter," Dr. Farrell]

 
MALE AFFIRMATION:  I know that my involvement with my children is more important to their future than either the quality of the school they attend or the amount of money we have.  I spend as much time with my children as I can.  I understand that my emotional presence is vital to the future of my children.  

FEMALE AFFIRMATION:  I know that the involvement of my children's father with our children is crucial to their future, and I do everything I can to encouragement their relationship and bonding.

 

 
 

"The journey of a thousand miles, starts with a single step."
Chinese proverb

 
   
 

Affirmation:  Today I will take the first step.

 

 

 

 

 

Affirmation:  
I will tell my loved ones that I love them --
every day, in every way --
There's a realm of silence beyond the grave.
P.S.  I will show them, too!

Photo from  
"Snowflakes:  Winter's Secret Beauty" 

 

 

 

 

Don't be a copy, be an original

 
 


Photo by JustImagineInc

 

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QUOTE:  "It doesn't do you any good to play small."  [Author Unknown]

AFFIRMATION: I will play large--I will be myself and be fully present in all my conversations today.  I will not hide the parts of me I don't like, or are timid about, or ashamed of.  I will bring all of me with me today.    

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"The Four Queens Discover Sir Lancelot"

“Many a time I have wanted to stop talking and find out what I really believed."  
              
~ Walter Lippmann

 
  S
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by Cowper Affirmation:  I will stop talking today long enough to figure out what I really believe.   

 


"The Russian Schoolgirl,"
by Nancy Worcester

A FEMALE ...

Age 3:  Looks at herself and sees a Queen.
Age 8:  Looks at herself and sees herself as Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty.
Age 15:  Looks at herself and sees herself as Cinderella/Sleeping Beauty/
Cheerleader or if she is PMSing, sees Fat/Pimples/UGLY.
Age 20:  Looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight, too curly" but decides she's going anyway.
Age 30:  Looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight, too curly" but decides she doesn't have time to fix it so she's going anyway.
Age 40: Looks at herself and sees "too fat/too thin, too short/too tall, too straight, too curly" and says, "At least I'm clean" and goes anyway.
Age 50:  Looks at herself and sees "I am" and goes wherever she wants to go.
Age 60:  Looks at herself and reminds herself of all the people who can't even see themselves in the mirror any more.  Goes out and conquers the world.
Age 70:  Looks at herself and sees wisdom, laughter and ability.  Goes out and enjoys life.
Age 80:  Doesn't bother to look.  Just puts on a purple hat and goes out to have fun with the world.

                           Author:  Unknown 

Affirmation:  I WILL GO ANYWAY!

P.S.  WHO DETHRONED YOU?

 

"Intuition is increasingly recognized as a natural mental faculty, a key element in the creative process , a means to discovery, problem-solving, and decision-making.  Once considered the province of a gifted few, it is now recognized as an innate capacity available to everyone - not a rare, accidental talent, but a natural skill anyone can cultivate." 
Intuition magazine
Royalty free image from comstock.com

 

 

 

 

“To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best night and day to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight, and never stop fighting."
       e.e.cummings
 
 
Affirmation:  
Today I will be ME.
   

 

 


Photo: JustImagineInc

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Estee Lauder controls 45% of the cosmetics' market in U.S. department stores. 
Even after 40 years in business, Estée Lauder would attend every launch of a new cosmetics counter or shop, traveling all over the world.

Every Saturday she would go to her grandson's Origins store in Manhattan's hip SoHo district and say, "Let me teach you how to sell."
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The Lauder families' shares are worth more than $6 billion.       
AFFIRMATION:  I will learn what my strengths are, develop them, and use them fully in my personal life and work.  I will build my life around my strengths, I will be more of who I am.  I will do work for which I have passion, and bring passion to my work.

 

"In the face of an obstacle which it is impossible to overcome, stubbornness is stupid."
--Simone de Beauvoir


Photo:  JustImagine Inc

 
Affirmation:  Today I will give up on something I'm clinging to with my ego and "let go."  I will accept.  I will give myself peace.  I will keep my face turned toward the sun.

 

 

"We teach what we know, 
but we reproduce what we are."

                                                       ~ Winston Churchill


Affirmation:  
Today I will look around at what I have taught 
and I will see what I am.  If I don't like it,
I will have the courage to change.

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AFFIRMATION

Today I will write my  Personal Mission Statement®, the "law" which will organize my life.  I will use my Personal Mission Statement® as a touchstone for decisions, actions, direction, purpose, goals and plans..

"It is the law that makes organized life possible."
             --Ray Garrett, Jr., Chairman, SEC          

 

 

 

""The 'Everyone Does It' defense--An investment advisor learns the lesson that Mom tried to teach you when you were small.  Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't make it right."
~ Mark J. Astarita, re: SEC ruling

Royal free photo from comstock.com Mom:  "If Mary Jane sat on a hot stove, would you?"
Affirmation:  Today I will think for myself.  I will consider what I'm doing that makes me uncomfortable, things I rationalize as "okay" because "everyone else does it."  I will eliminate that toleration from my life.  I will align myself closer to my own personal integrity.

 

 

 

 

"What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say."

                        ~ Ralph Waldo Emerson 


Photo from JustImagineInc

Affirmation:  I will make sure my "self-presentation" is true to who I am.  I speak as I am, what I am, and about who I am.  I make it clear where I stand on things.  

 

 

 

 

"No, I don't understand my husband's theory of relativity, but I know my husband and I know he can be trusted."  
  --Elsa Einstein

Photo by Kelly Dunn
        

AFFIRMATION:  Today I will increase my Trust Radius.  It's an EQ competency.  I will trust others until proven otherwise.   

Albert Einstein, Nobel Prize Winner

 

 

Affirmation:  Today I will be gentle.

It is only the very strong 
who can afford to be gentle.

 

 

 

THE SNOWFLAKE
"How full of creative genius is the air in which these are  generated!  I should hardly admire them more if real stars fell and lodged on my coat."  * Henry David Thoreau

AFFIRMATION:  I will remain curious and see the wonder that is around me.  I admit I may have been missing something.  

Snowflake Photo by Rasmussen

 

"The hand that rocks the cradle"--but there 
is no such hand.
It is bad to rock the baby, they would have us understand;
So the cradle's but a relic of the former foolish days,
When mothers reared their children in 
unscientific ways;
When they jounced them and they bounced them, those poor dwarfs of long ago--
The Washingtons and Jeffersons, you know."
~Bishop George Washington Doane

Photo by JustImagineInc

AFFIRMATION:  I dare to rear my children in "unscientific" ways.  I use my heart and my intuition to guide me, as well as common sense.  I jounce them, and bounce them, and rock their cradle.  I unabashedly adore them and hold them all I can. 

 

 

 

 

 

"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago.  The second best time is now." ~ Chinese Proverb

AFFIRMATION:  
It's never too late unless I don't start now.

 

 

"Under all speech that is good for anything, 
There lies a silence that is better.
Silence is deep as Eternity;
Speech is shallow as Time.
                                      ~ Thomas Carlyle

 

 

 

 

AFFIRMATION:
I honor silence in my life, allowing myself time for reflection.

I honor the silence of others, when they need peace or rest in my presence, or when they struggle for words.

I listen into the silence for the words not spoken.

I allow silence in my conversations with others, so that they can say what they need to say without haste or interruption.

Photo: JustImagineInc


 

 

 

 

If you want to develop your intuition, live your life fully.  James F. T. Bugental writes about the therapist's trained, practiced and disciplined sensitivity: "With experience it can make possible the detection of nuances of feelings and meanings that would elude...explicit documentation.  This sensitivity is not solely a matter of education or supervision.  It is a product of life experience ... the produce of varied and meaningful human contacts, of exposure to the esthetic dimensions of life (art, poetry, myths, music), and of [introspection and reflection]."  
 

AFFIRMATION:  I live my life fully, so I am intuitive and empathic.  I know myself.  I know people of different cultures, am curious about other religions,  I read good literature, and I study myths, great art and classical music.  I have learned another language and I have traveled.  I have enriched my life with this exposure to deeper dimensions.  I reflect on my experience daily.  In this way, I increase my emotional intelligence at the foundational level.  
Photo:  www.justimagineinc.com 

 

 

"All Glory comes from daring to begin."
~ Eugene F. Ware

Affirmation:  I know that beginning is often the hardest part.  I know from experience, having gone through this cycle many times, that once I get the momentum going, the project usually falls into place.  taking action seems to get everything else moving--ideas come to me, resources, people ... and so ... I date to begin.

 

 

 

 

 

William Barret Travis loved to read, borrowing what books were available on the Texas frontier.  He read quickly, sometimes reading a major work in only a few days.

The Alamo

LETTER HE WROTE BEFORE HE DIED:

"Take care of my little boy. If the country should be saved, I may make him a splendid fortune; but if the country should be lost, and I should perish, he will have nothing but the proud recollection that he is the son of a man who died for his country."

AFFIRMATION:  I will consider today what proud recollection I would like my son [s] or daughter[s] to have about me.

When he died, at the Alamo, he was only 26 years old.

WILLIAM BARRET TRAVIS

AFFIRMATION:  I read as much as I can, and I read the hard stuff.  I appreciate the opportunity I have to learn, and the access to materials I have.
 

 

"You'll never attain it unless you know the feeling."
     ~J
ohann Wolfgang von Goethe
"I want it so bad I
    can TASTE it!"

 

Affirmation:  I stay in touch with my feelings.  When I want something, I am passionate about it-.  I envision it.  I imagine it so strongly I can taste it, feel it, smell it.  I live from my passion.  I pursue my goals with both my heart and my mind. 

 

 

 

"Hell, there are no rules here--we're trying to accomplish something."
  ~Thomas Alva Edison

AFFIRMATION:  I am creative in my problem-solving.  I generate options and consider possible alternatives.  I'm open to new and better ways of doing things.  If I can't figure out one way to do it, I'll try something else.  
 

 

 

Look! how he laughs and stretches out his arms,
  And opens wide his blue eyes upon thine,
  To hail his father; while his little form
      Flutters as winged with joy. Talk not of pain!
        The childless cherubs well might envy thee
          The pleasures of a parent.
      -  George Gordon, Lord Byron

AFFIRMATION:  I take delight in the pleasures of a parent.  I make time to play with my child, and give him or her the greatest gift I have--my complete, undivided attention.  I realize what a gift I have been given, to have a child.

 

 

 

 

 


Written by Chester, age 5
in answer to "How Do You Make a a Pumpkin Pie"

 

 

 

     
     
     
     

 

 

 

Thought:  Hawaiian kupunas say:  You will have to forgive three time:

  • You must forgive yourself, for you will never be perfect

  • You have to forgive your enemies, for the fire of your anger will only consume you and your family

the fire of your anger

  • Most difficult of all - you have to forgive your friends, because they are close enough to hurt you by accident

When you think of the people you need to forgive, often they are the same people you love the most.

AFFIRMATION:  I forgive myself quickly and habitually and I also forgive me enemies, and the ones I love, quickly and habitually.  I know the only person I hurt when I hate is myself, and also if there are any children around.  Children do not grow well around "hate".

[Source:  "Pleasure Prescription," Paul Pearsall, Ph.D.]
A kupuna is a respected elder.
Photo:  JustImagineInc

 

 

 

 

 

   
"The biggest problem with communication is  the illusion that it has been accomplished."  ~GB Shaw

AFFIRMATION:  I will remember that mine is not the only perspective.  I am patient when I communicate with others and try to see things from their point of view.  I also try and help them see mine.  Sometimes they see more, sometimes they see less, and sometimes they can't see what I see at all.


Photo by Kelly Dunn

 

 

 

 

David Perlmutter, M.D. feels that an “explosive personality” should be added to the list of important risk factors for strokes, which include elevated cholesterol, cigarette smoking, obesity, family history, and coronary artery disease. T
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“Men who reported a high level of outward expression of anger – men who tended to have angry outbursts, had about twice the risk of stroke compared to men who controlled their tempers." A
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AFFIRMATION:  I refuse to endanger my health by engaging in an "explosive personality."  I care about myself and I care about my loved ones.  I exercise regularly, practice stress reduction techniques, and educate myself about anger management.  I build rest and relaxation into my daily schedule.  
I am a woman and I compliment my husband every time he controls his temper when he's angry. I am a man and I find other ways to deal with anger rather than hitting people, throwing things, venting, shouting or cursing.   Click To Preview
 

 

             

"We don't stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing."  ~George Bernard Shaw


Photo:  JustImagineInc

Affirmation:  I find time to play and rejoice every day.  I don't need a reason to laugh; I laugh because laughing makes me feel good.  I rejoice that I'm alive and able to have fun.  I understand that the more playful I am, the more creative I can be.  I "take care of business," but I do it in a joyful and passionate way.  At work, I keep a dish of candy on my desk to lure people to come around and chat with me for a minute.  I always have time for people and I always have time for fun! 

 

 

 

 

   
 
AFFIRMATION:  I keep my life in balance.  I eat nutritious food, exercise regularly, meditate and practice stress relief, work and play, and have good relationships.  Therefore I sleep like a baby at night! Photo by Kelly Dunn

 

 

MARS
The God of War
"How much more grievous are the consequences of anger than the causes of it."  
                       ~Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
The Greeks differentiated between wars, as evidenced by their myths.  Mars was the god of lustful, vengeful wars.  Athena was the goddess of just wars.  These are metaphors for different kinds on anger.

Mars is the more primitive anger --
sexual jealousy, invasion of territory, violent assault.  He represents our animal nature.  

Athena represents a reasoned anger--when we sense an injustice for instance.  It's more cerebral, less frequent, less inflammatory.

Mars represents the sort of free-
floating hostility we can get into with stress,  competition, and today's lifestyle.  When someone cuts you off in traffic, for instance.

"To

the

victor

goes

the

bypass."

Paul
Pearsall,
Ph.D.,
psycho-
neuro-
immunologist

AUTHOR OF

THE PLEASURE PRESCRIPTION

Read this book if you want to understand anger!

AFFIRMATION:  My body does not care whether my anger is "justified" or not.  The physiological reactions are the same and they are involuntary--it happens.  The adrenal wreaks havoc on my body.  In order to take care of myself, I have many ways to self-soothe.  I work with a coach.  I get massages.  I have a strong social network and family.  I practice Tai Chi. I meditate.  I work out.  I do not let my anger get the better of me.   

 

 


"True contentment is a real, even an active virtue--not only affirmative but creative.  It is the power of getting out of any situation all there is in it."  ~GK Chesterton

AFFIRMATION:  Instead of letting myself be overtaken by extreme emotions I will try and stay "level" today--not too high, not too low.  I will try and be the hardest thing of all--content. 

 

 

 

"Twenty years from now you'll be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did.  So throw off the bowlines.  Sail away from the safe harbor.  Catch the trade winds in your sails.  Explore.  Dream."  ~Mark Twain

AFFIRMATION:

I'll do this today; I'll have an adventure.  I will leave a safe harbor, literally or figuratively, a place of comfort.  I will throw off the bowlines--my ordinary defenses, my regular way of dressing,, or my usual companion for lunch.  I will catch the trade winds in my sails--following some fancy for no particular reason at all--a whim, a lark, a joyride.  I will explore--a new person, a new place, a new thing, a new idea.  And I will dream!

BON VOYAGE!

 

 

 

  "A true man never frets his place in the world, but just slides into it by the gravitation of his nature, and swings there as easily as a star."  ~ Edwin H. Chapin  
AFFIRMATION:  My life fits me like a hand in a glove.  It's like it was made for me because I made it.  By following my instincts and paying attention to how I felt in different situations, I chose what was right for me, what I liked to do, and with whom I liked to work and relate.   

 

 

 

                                                      

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